When Cosmopolitan launched in 1886, the glossy’s editor called it a “first-class family magazine.” Indeed, early issues of the mag featured articles by the likes of Jack London and Theodore Roosevelt, and covered topics like climbing Mount Vesuvius and the life of Mozart. In recent decades, Cosmo moved away from family fun towards a level of sexual explicitness that makes third wave feminists cringe and hapless women fixated on pleasing men.

Sometimes you just want to take a bite out of communism or at least a little lick. Satisfy your sweet tooth and nutty desire to know what the former head of the Russian Soviet Socialist Republic tastes like with Vladimir Lenin head pops. The Lenin lollipop apparently tastes like cola, which would mean a Woodrow Wilson sucker would likely taste like Orange Crush.

If history lessons land you in zzzzz land, consider reviewing major moments in history with the help of everyone’s favorite mechanical drawing toy. Check out the Etch A Sketch gallery that features monumental events like the moon landing, Bush’s “Mission Accomplished” speech and the Krakatoa volcanic eruption. History sure looks more fun on flat gray screen in a red plastic frame!

If the endless room makeover ideas featured on hours of cable TV home shows don’t suit your fancy, why not jazz up your digs with a little Super Mario Bros. flavor? People looking to add a some Mario to their decor style can buy movable and reusable decals based on the exact 8-bit graphics from the original Super Mario Bros. game. If the highest selling video game of all time fails to please your decorator eye, Nintendo also offers Donkey Kong and New Super Mario Bros.

Long before the days of self-checkout lines and aisle after aisle price checkers, the first product purchased by scanning a UPC code occurred at an Ohio Supermarket on June 26, 1974. A man named Clyde Dawson bought a 10-pack of Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit, a purchase so monumental that the gum goods now sit on display at the Smithsonian

Put away those gold grills because a new dental trend has taken over: tooth tattoos. The Tooth Artist can tattoo nearly any image onto your pearly whites, making them more of a sooty gray, but isn’t a David Letterman or Abe Lincoln tooth ink worth it?

Residents in a Baltimore neighborhood have a stinky mystery on their hands after an unidentified man tossed a bag of feces onto the front porch of a home. The baffling incident disgusted neighbors and now police have the icky task of determining if the poop originated from a human or an animal. A surveillance camera captured a shot of the man, who authorities describe as balding and wearing a moustache.

Thirsty and in need of a little pick-me-up? Skip the Red Bull and try a Booty Sweat. If you can’t quite imagine what perspiration from a derriere tastes like, you’ll have to find out for yourself. The curiously-named beverage will hit store shelves as part of the promotion for the new Ben Stiller flick Tropic Thunder and will be offered in two different packages, an urban-market targeted design and one for the rural folks. Urbanites opting for a sip of Booty Sweat will get an extended drink description that includes promoting the drink as “this swill will crank yo’ metabolism up skippin’ right over jiggy to straight G-pimp level.” People in rural areas just get a plain can sans the lengthy description.

A group called Presidential Memorial Commission has collected 8,500 signatures in support of a plan to rename San Francisco’s sewage treatment facilities after President George W. Bush. The group claims the renaming provides a “fitting monument to the President’s work.”

Remember plopping down in front of the old Zenith for Saturday morning cartoons with a big bowl of Cocoa Hoots? No? Well, the folks over at WFMU have created a photo gallery of retro kid cereal to help you brush up on morning munchies. Cereal flashbacks include Kellogg’s OKs, Tutti Frutti flavored Twinkles, Crunchy Loggs and a whole slew of King Vitamin boxes featuring a man creepy enough to make you switch to Cheerios.

Wired put the word out to all keyboard art specialists two weeks ago for an ASCII art contest and the entires proved quite impressive to the team of judges that included entrepreneur Osamu Higuchi and online media expert Ichiroo Kiyota. John AuCoin of Houston, Texas claimed the top prize with his “Creation of Adam” ASCII drawing that included a XXX over Adam’s nether region. Hmm, I would have opted for a couple Os, an exclamation point and a handful of ~~~.

Lego bricks have put smiles on kids’ (and probably quite a few adults’) faces since the 1950s, so imagine the delight of one luck Gizmodo contributor when he had the chance to visit the toy company’s secret vault. The vault contains every Lego set ever produced, all 4,720 of them. From Lego Space to Lego Technic to Lego Town to Lego Castle, the treasure chest of Lego fun sparks oodles childhood memories. Lego-riffic!

Today, Friday, June 20, isn’t just the second longest day of the year. It’s also Take Your Dog to Work Day, a business holiday celebrated since 1999. If you plan to celebrate, bring a friendly dog, tire him out before work, and make sure to take plenty of bathroom breaks during the day.

If your Teddy Ruxpin has been gathering dust since the late 1980s, break out that creepy animatronic bear and take a gander at this DIY “How to Make a Twittering Teddy Bear” video. With a little 2.0 surgery, old Teddy starts spewing real-time Twitter updates. No word on why the “surgeons” decided to make the new Teddy a cross-dresser. Next up: Facebook Status-Updating Cabbage Patch Kid!

If playing solitaire and sneaking naps under your cubicle desk haven’t cured your workplace boredom, consider stealing (or “borrowing,” if HR asks) some thumbtacks from the supply room and creating your very own Push-Pin-Barack. Or just take a look at someone who already did it.

For many of us, clutter has invaded our homes and despite the frustration sighs and ambitious spring cleaning goals, we remain living side-by-side with old art projects, 20 muffin tins and countless knick knacks. Online entrepreneur Dave Bruno couldn’t stand the untidiness any longer and decided to kick his clutter habit by undertaking the 100 Thing Challenge. Bruno has committed to keeping 100 personal possessions and keeps a running tally on his blog. Professional organizer Julie Morgenstern calls the de-clutter process “a very emotional process,” but says the shedding of stuff can help clear out mental clutter along with the crystal turtle collection.

The world’s fattest man is hoping to slim down enough to walk his bride down the aisle. Manuel Uribe once tipped the scales at a world record 560kg (1232 lbs), but has dropped to about 310kg (682 lbs), losing a possible record-breaking 250kg (550 lbs). He celebrated his 43rd birthday last week with a wish to be able to stand up on his wedding day.

Last month, at El Camino High School in Oceanside, CA, police, administrators, and teachers staged the “deaths” of 26 students to make the kids aware of the dangers of drunk driving. Now, many students and parents are angry over the stunt. Some are truly indifferent: “You feel betrayed…” said 15-year-old Carolyn Magos. “But… if it saves one life, it’s worth it.” Adolf Hitler called and he wants his soul back.

Cinderella the piglet doesn’t find much in common with the old saying of “being as happy as a pig in muck”–the black and white swine’s aversion to mud forced her owner to create special shoes for the picky piggy. Farmer Andre Keeble fit Cinderella with a pair of green galoshes perfect for avoiding dirt or a rainy night out in New York City.
(Photo Credit: Ross Parry Agency Ltd)

Yes, it’s happening again an eBay auction of a user’s Twitter profile. The highest bidder will receive exclusive rights to post any image in the user profile and background. The bid is currently at $430, the user has 438 followers. I wonder how much Guy Kawasaki would raise having over 13,000 followers.

Remember MIT student, Star Simpson who startled airport officials by wearing a sweatshirt with a blinking circuit board? She was sentenced to 1-year probation, community service and ordered to write a letter of apology. No word on if the fashion police will be filing charges for her hairdo.

Here’s one for the dumbest criminal files. A liquor store in Arkansas reported their soda machine missing. Police followed the tracks from the store to the front lawn of the thieves. Let the small town jokes begin.

The latest installment in the Indiana Jones series hits theaters Friday, but with mixed reviews, let’s live in the past and check out some awesome Indiana Jones facts. For instance, did you know Tom Selleck almost donned the brown fedora? Or, did you ever notice the cameo appearances by Steven Spielberg, George Lucas and Dan Akroyd in 1984’s Temple of Doom? Check out more fun facts to impress your friends or to pass the time if Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull proves to be a snoozefest.

The TV fans over at mikesacks had a bit of fun with the pause button and compiled an interesting and giggle worthy selection of screen pictures. Highlights include a young boy who, according to news reports, “refers to his younger brother David as ’smelly’” and closed captioning that goes a bit awry. Not surprisingly, much of the content comes from local news stations, you know, the ones that always grab the crazy, one-toothed neighbor for random interviews.

Robert Furlong, the Fire Chief of Lower Swatara Township heard a rustling outside of his house and discovered flight attendant Adrianna Grace Connor in his vehicle. Connor said that she and pilot Jeffery Paul Bradford wandered into the woods for some drunken sex. Connor found her way out, Bradford was found by a search posse — it’s unclear whether the two of them found each other to complete the deed.